urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:automaticmotiff werd. Dave. 2008-02-13T08:38:02Z urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:automaticmotiff:19809 2008-02-13T08:38:02Z 2008-02-13T08:38:02Z I'm just going to say "Fuck". urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:automaticmotiff:19484 2008-02-02T08:46:22Z 2008-02-02T08:46:22Z I fucking hate the hypocrite parents I have.<br />I fucking hate the god damn life style that I have.<br />I fucking hate that I knew so many people and they're pretty much out of my life like an unwanted pregnancy on prom night.<br />I fucking hate all the people I have to deal with on a day to day basis.<br />I fucking hate that I'm going nowhere.<br />I fucking hate the thought I have no idea what I want to do in life.<br />I fucking hate that nobody even knows.<br />I really fucking hate that I can't do a god damn thing about it. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:automaticmotiff:19238 2008-01-08T01:13:14Z 2008-01-08T01:13:14Z I really don't know where I'm going in life.<br />Relationships.<br />career.<br />morales.<br /><br />It's not like things are bad for me, but they're not great. I find myself analyzing people<br />and feeling very envious. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:automaticmotiff:18983 2007-03-06T22:14:22Z 2007-03-06T22:14:22Z Fuck everyone.<br />Who can bitch in 70 degree, <br />beautiful fucking weather? urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:automaticmotiff:18798 2007-02-03T22:34:23Z 2007-02-03T22:34:23Z Holy fucking shit!<br />I love my fucking job!<br />Praise the LORD.<br />At my orientation it was just the other people starting<br />out, and we just talked about different video games for like an hour and half.<br />It was so fucking awesome.<br />Then I found out that video game publishers and developers go to our store<br />all the time, like just last week, all the employee's got a free copy of Gears of War.<br />Shit damn! I also get all the free movies I want to watch, I get to rent movies out on dvd <br />that aren't even for sell to the general public. Then I also get to play games before the come out<br />on sale.<br />Fuck shit damn cock fuck ass shit, I'm fucking lucky. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:automaticmotiff:18670 2007-02-02T20:51:04Z 2007-02-02T20:51:04Z I got a job at Game Crazy as being shift leader.<br />Fuck yeah! urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:automaticmotiff:18272 2007-01-25T22:12:00Z 2007-01-25T22:12:00Z I'm fucking bored off my ass.<br />I need to find something to do during the day.<br />Fuck it, I'm going to go play Half-Life 2. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:automaticmotiff:18057 2007-01-22T09:53:05Z 2007-01-22T09:53:05Z I had the ambition to go to sleep early tonight.<br />With that, I can't fucking sleep.<br />I had a panic attack the other day.<br />Fucking Bullshit. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:automaticmotiff:17842 2006-11-05T11:07:43Z 2006-11-05T11:07:43Z I wish I could get a fucking call for a job.<br />I miss Keiha.<br />Fuck.<br />I really wish shit was easier.<br />I feel as if everything is impossible to reach. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:automaticmotiff:17635 2006-09-21T23:25:50Z 2006-09-21T23:25:50Z Well, surgery went fine.<br />I feel like hell.<br />The entire incident feels like a dream.<br /><br />Ahahaha!!!<br />It was funny, when the nurse took out the I.V. a stream of blood followed<br />from my wrist, she was all sorts of freaking the fuck out.<br /><br />Eh, like Jay, of Jay and Silent Bob said, "Man, perkiset fucks you up!"<br />I now know what he's talking about.<br />Hahaha!!! urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:automaticmotiff:17280 2006-09-21T01:38:05Z 2006-09-21T01:38:05Z Surgery tomorrow.<br />12:45pm.<br />Fuck. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:automaticmotiff:16925 2006-09-18T05:02:21Z 2006-09-18T05:02:21Z So Heather and I challenged a middle schooler and a highschooler <br />to a pick up game of basically ball.<br />Heather and I, obviously out of shape.<br />Them adequately in shape.<br /><br />Anyways, we kicked they're ass 12 to 8.<br />It was so fucking funny for some reason.<br /><br />Fuckin' stoner ass little kids. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:automaticmotiff:16671 2006-09-13T07:06:36Z 2006-09-13T07:06:36Z Alright, I had one of the worst pains in my right testicle last night.<br />I wanted to cry, but I didn't.<br />Today though, it was the left. <br />It hurt so fucking bad I could barely walk,<br />and when I coughed it was a extreme surge of pain.<br />So I refrained from smoking.<br /><br />Lifes good.<br />I need to stop being so indecisive, and create dramatic scenarios <br />in my head, damn, I do need to stop that.<br /><br />Surgery was pushed back another 2 fucking weeks.<br />So its going to take even longer for me to get my shit together<br />and kick it to Portland.<br /><br />I miss people, I miss the way things were.<br />Damn, life's a bitch.<br /><br /><font size="3">I need some fucking closure.</font> urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:automaticmotiff:16599 2006-08-30T20:42:05Z 2006-08-30T20:42:05Z I just found out today.<br />I'm pretty damn good at playing the Harmonica. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:automaticmotiff:16143 2006-08-28T04:56:03Z 2006-08-28T04:56:03Z I'm here at the house that I'm sitting up in Federal Way.<br />This place is fucking amazing.<br />I could get use to this, suburbs aren't that bad.<br />Progressively the women become better looking (Too bad they're more than likely superficial).<br />Everywhere I see Porsche's, Jaguar's, and Bentley's.<br />I really could get use to this. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:automaticmotiff:16069 2006-08-22T04:18:50Z 2006-08-22T04:18:50Z I just purchased my first motor vehicle.<br />I feel good.<br />Too bad I can't fucking drive it.<br />Parents are bitches. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:automaticmotiff:15756 2006-08-21T05:31:43Z 2006-08-21T05:31:43Z That was really odd.<br />I just got off the phone with Sarah, to see if her and Logan were alright.<br />I hang up, I then hear screaming on the other side of the pond.<br />Huh. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:automaticmotiff:15513 2006-08-17T23:43:16Z 2006-08-17T23:43:16Z I found out today that I could die. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:automaticmotiff:15184 2006-08-16T03:17:23Z 2006-08-16T03:17:23Z $400 a month.<br />Plus an extra $40-50 for bills.<br />This is for one room mind you.<br />Fucking bullshit.<br />Oregon's minimum wage is $7.15.<br />Fuck this.<br />I can't take this, <i>plus</i> my testicles<br />either having, a thickening of the "tubing", a si st, or a hernia. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:automaticmotiff:14934 2006-08-14T06:19:48Z 2006-08-14T06:19:48Z I swear I'm becoming more and more bi-polar.<br />I'm happy one day or one hour, then I just feel like shit.<br />I'm never "there" mentally anymore it seems like.<br />I feel han-di capped in ways.<br />Physically, there's something wrong with me, I've felt like shit <br />the past few days. I've been getting testicular pains again, except extremely worse.<br />They hit my stomach and make it turn over.<br />I'm constantly restless, weak, and confused.<br />My mother is making a doctor's appointment for me sometime this week.<br /><br />I've been thinking allot lately, trying to stay positive,(works for about five minutes)<br />but it seems like such a challenge for me lately.<br /><br />I found myself staring at the moon last night hardly enjoying a cigarette, saying to myself,<br />hoping for an answer back "Whats on the other side of that moon?".<br /><br /><b>I know not everyone has they're shit figured out.<br />I know life isn't easy.<br />I know living isn't cheap.<br />I know I'm in for quite a ride.</b><br /><br />What would I do right now without Frank Sinatra and Radiohead?<br />Anyways, Portland here I come. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:automaticmotiff:14798 2006-08-12T09:50:32Z 2006-08-12T09:50:32Z For the first time, in a long time.<br />I'm happy, like a consistent happy. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:automaticmotiff:14500 2006-08-12T00:25:10Z 2006-08-12T00:25:10Z That was one of the most emotional fights ever.<br />I feel lost.<br />Shit isn't easy.<br />I fucking hate crying.<br />I wish my mom could understand me.<br />I wish i could understand her.<br /><br />On another note, I'm going to be moving to portland sometime around september I believe.<br />I don't want to, but I think its for the best.<br />I know people don't want me to leave, but shit, something <br />has to happen with me.<br />I need to find something for me, I need to focus on me for once.<br />I'm into shit I can't handle.<br />But fuck, I need something different.<br />I need a sign, something, to show me the fucking way.<br />Because right now, I'm blinded by;<br /><b>Wanting shit to stay the same.<br />Feeling like shit pretty much everyday and having to hide it.<br />Feeling sorry for myself.<br />Also not being susceptible to all this change.</b><br /><br />I <i>need</i> this.<br />I'll be leaving everything I've ever known,<br />but this will be for the best.<br /><br />"If it wasn't this, it'd be something else." urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:automaticmotiff:14134 2006-07-31T09:16:55Z 2006-07-31T09:16:55Z ...I'm pretty much useless. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:automaticmotiff:13999 2006-07-25T06:52:15Z 2006-07-25T06:52:15Z Rejoice - Pedro The Lion I'm not dead.<br /><br />I feel like I've lost allot of good friends.<br /><br />I'm annoyed with everything.<br /><br />Everyone seems to be annoyed with everything I do lately.<br /><br />I'm really trying to get my shit together.<br /><br />I'm still getting shit from my best of friends though.<br /><br />They more than likely don't mean it.<br /><br />If so, fuck it.<br /><br />Still hurts.<br /><br />I'm analyzing everything lately.<br /><br />So I've been smoking pot allot lately, fucking deal with it. I do it cuase I feel like I have nothing else better to do.<br /><br />If you think I have a problem, come to me as someone with compassion and patience. Not a rude comment that would ultimately ruin a good night.<br /><br />I don't believe people are understanding where I'm coming from.<br /><br />I don't believe anything I'm saying is justifying any of my actions.<br /><br />I do believe this will pass though. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:automaticmotiff:13636 2006-07-15T20:05:40Z 2006-07-15T20:05:40Z I passed my written.<br />25 out of 25.<br />My drive is scheduled 2 weeks from today.<br />So stoked.